Giving something up doesn't mean missing out

My husband and I are a bit over half way through a 100 day no-added-sugar challenge.

In response to hearing that we are doing this - usually after we've just refused a piece of cake or dessert and explained why - people's reactions are mixed, but often fall on the side of "glad it's you and not me. That sounds too hard."

People seem to worry for us that we are missing out on something, that it sounds too difficult, "this doesn't have much sugar, does it?" And they ask us "Don't you have less energy?"

But I've actually found the opposite is true. I have more energy because my body is not burdened with dealing with processed sugar. When I removed refined foods and replaced them with more healthful ones, I found the benefits have meant I don't feel like I'm 'missing out'. And you realise all the places sugar is hiding. Sometimes the cakes and chocolates might look tempting, but when I consider how much better I feel without them, it's much easier to say no and feel genuinely happy about it.

I'm not saying any food is evil, but I do think we've been lulled into believing some of the things we eat aren't really that bad, even when they are devastating our health.

But my point in this is not actually focused on our physical health. There's definitely a spiritual analogy in this.

When we make changes in our lives, when we let the Holy Spirit lead, our lives might look a bit radical, a bit different to others. We might give up things or let go of things that others look on and don't understand.

Isn't that too difficult?

Don't you feel like you're missing out?

Surely you don't need to be extreme about it?

But when you experience the real benefits and real power of the Holy Spirit, nothing else compares anymore. Giving up your old nature, your old values, you old way of thinking seems trifling in comparison.

And it's even better than just giving up some unhealthy food and feeling more energetic, because it is a supernatural energy. It is all down to the Holy Spirit, not your own strength, drive or will power.

Sometimes you might feel tempted. Sometimes your old self beckons like a sugar laden bowl of lollies. "But I'll taste so good. Just have a little bit..."

But the closer you are with the Spirit, and the longer you stay this way, the easier it is to recognise the temptation and realise it doesn't have the power over you it once did.

Though you can choose to turn away if you decide to.

We had chocolate and soft drink when it was my husbands birthday. It wasn't that we gave in on the spur of the moment because the temptation was too great. A bit like Eve, I decided I was going to eat sugar that day and make the most of it, and I think my husband went along with me. Then we both got sick and felt horrible for the next week. We'd cleaned out our systems and they now recognised this stuff as foreign and utterly useless to our bodies.

It is the same when you are in tune with the things of God.

The things of the world are seen as the pale imitations they really are. The things that we once thought weren't that bad, that we only did it sometimes, that it was just a white lie, that its not really hurting anyone... they stand out in stark relief and we see that our lives were being whittled down and the lines blurred so we lived in complacency, apathy and impotency.

Don't be afraid of what others will think. Don't be afraid that you'll be missing out on the 'cake' of life if you give everything over to God. 

Have faith that the God who created you knows the things that will really satisfy -  not momentarily and fleetingly, leaving you empty and guilty - but a lasting purpose, vitality and satisfaction that can only come from being fully committed to the relationship with God for which you were made.

Brothers and sisters, in light of all I have shared with you aboutGod’s mercies, I urge you to offer your bodies as a living and holy sacrifice to God, a sacred offering that brings Him pleasure; this is your reasonable, essential worship. Do not allow this world to mold you in its own image. Instead, be transformed from the inside out by renewing your mind. As a result, you will be able to discern what God wills and whatever God finds good, pleasing, and complete.

Romans 12:1-2

The biggest defences around our biggest insecurities

It's funny how often the things we feel like we least have to worry about, turn out to be the things that trip us up. Did I say funny? I meant ironic and annoying.


It could be the old 'pride before a fall' - we stop paying attention because we think it's all ok, and it gets away from us.


But sometimes it's because we are fooling ourselves.


Have you ever heard someone boasting about their skills and talents? Telling you how great their life is? If you don't immediately dismiss them thinking they are conceited and just don't know how to be humble, you may get the sneaking suspicion that they aren't all as together as their bluster is trying to prove.


We do this to ourselves, and it's a lot harder to pick. You rarely ignore yourself for being boastful and blustery.


What do you find yourself justifying? For what aspects of your life do you find yourself coming up with convincing arguments about why it's all ok? What are the biggest obelisks of personal pride in your life, the things that you will hold on to no matter what anyone else says? The things you are tempted to pursue and continue, even if others don't like it? The things you to which you say 'they just don't understand'?


Chances are, if you have to have conversations with yourself about something, you're putting up defences. 


We build the biggest defences around our biggest insecurities. 


I have been learning how to examine myself this year - to pull apart all my thoughts on shopping (through Project 3:11), on travelling and other dreams I equated with my identity and worth, on family life, marriage and being a woman.


In all these areas there were things that I was guarding and protecting, putting up fronts to convince everyone that I was secure in who I was. The problem with putting up a facade of security is that behind the scenes you are denying yourself the chance to actually be who you are. Who God created you to be.


We often pick up things - experiences, beliefs, behaviours - that at one time made us feel a spark of confidence, of self worth, of meaning and purpose. They did it once, and so we carry them with us, continuing to pursue those things hoping they will continue to work.


They may have started as good things. The problem is, we turn the things - our talents, our dreams, our ideas - into the objects of our pursuit instead of the One who gave us those things. And while we are busy chasing things that rapidly lose any ability to define us like they once did - and were only a pale reflections to begin with - we are missing the chance to get the real thing.


What have you put the biggest defences around? What are you holding on to most tightly to make you feel secure in who you think you are, or are meant to be?


If it's anything other than your identity and worth in God, then maybe it's time to examine these idols.


For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. 1 Corinthians 3:11-13


It's not easy. I notice some things that feel so ingrained, so embedded in the bedrock of my emotional foundation, that it feels horribly unnerving to even imagine dislodging them.


But the amazing thing is, I don't have to do it alone. In most cases, I don't even have to do it at all.


If we start trying to pull everything apart ourselves, we will just end up dismantling our lives and being left with rubble. But if we are willing to surrender to God, to open our inmost selves up to Him, then he will take those things that aren't meant to be there and remove them. He takes those things out with more precision than the most skilled surgeon.


There have been things in my life that I have felt like I was struggling with forever, that I was convinced I would struggle with forever - nothing I tried seemed to be able to change it - and then in one moment with God...it was gone.


And unlike surgery, there hasn't been more damage done. You don't have to lie for weeks in a hospital bed and hope you don't get an infection.


And what you realise is, that thing you thought was to big, too foundational, too ingrained to move without everything else crumbling - you were never actually relying on it after all. Your self worth and value wasn't built on it at all. It was a false foundation. All this time you were built on God; everything is resting on him.


Any time God takes something out of our lives, it's a paradox. Normally if you take something away, there's a hole, an emptiness, a lack. But with God, if he takes it away, that space is filled with more of Him. You realise that thing you thought was too important to let go of, that you relied on too much to give over, was actually making you feel less worthy, less satisfied, less whole.


If you look around your life and notice some whopping great defences, don't be afraid to look behind them. Let God in to those places and you won't regret it.


Without those, you give God more room to fill your life with His purpose. The real thing is always better than a pale imitation.


Lay it down. Aren't you tired of carrying that heavy burden all by yourself? Aren't you tired of trying to hold up those defences?


I beg you to offer your lives as a living sacrifice to him. Romans 12:1 


My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:26


"Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new Spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put My Spirit within you". Ezekiel 36:26-27.

Without Excuse

I'm always hesitant to write about things that may be opinionated or controversial because I am very aware of my lack of authority or qualifications to talk about theology. The questions I have and topics I don't understand far, far outweigh the minuscule list of things I am sure of.

But I have read a few things lately about the topic of the 'final judgement'. I have not read it yet, but there has been a lot of talk about Rob Bell's book Love Wins and I read a blog by Rachel Held Evans and she discusses similar sorts of things.

There are many things that people question and struggle with, such as what about children who are too young to make a decision? What about people in remote places who have never had the chance to hear the gospel?

What are you waiting for?

We're taught to want things immediately, faster, sooner...now, now, now. We're impatient when things don't happen quickly, and if we have to wait for something we'll often take a different option rather than wait.

I get impatient if a webpage takes more than 10 seconds to load. And if it takes more than 30...well, you may as well forget it.

So when God says

No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come." Mark 13:32-33

So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him. Matthew 24:43-44

And do this, understanding the present time: The hour has already come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.  Romans 13:11-12

I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, now is the day of salvation. 2 Corinthians 6:2

this has been interpreted as soon. Our definition of soon. As in, "Ok, I'm ready, where are you?"

But we've been interpreting it as our definition of soon for 2000 years or so.

And I'm sure most of us can think of other times in our lives where we've felt like God was saying he was going to do something, something we needed to be ready for. So we got ready. And then waited. A day, a week, a couple of months. Then when nothing happened, we either got angry at God for not keeping his word, or angry at ourselves for thinking it was God when it wasn't.

Only to discover, maybe even years later, that God's timing wasn't ours. We waited a few months, he was working over a few years. Even a lifetime.

The world teaches us to be impatient, to want things fast and now. The eternal God's definition of now, of soon, is vastly different to ours.

God keeps reminding me of this. He keeps saying to me "What is one year compared to eternity? What is one lifetime compared to Forever?"

That's a frustrating thought when we're in the midst of something we want to change. But it's actually a comforting thought when we really think about it. We know God always keeps his word, so when we know he's not acting immediately on our terms, we can be assured he's got the bigger picture in mind. If God was like the ancient Greek and Roman gods acting on fallible human whims and impulses we'd be in a whole lot of trouble.

We can be thankful God is eternal and knows a bigger picture than we can ever comprehend. Sometimes we just need to be patient.

So why does he use words like 'Now is the time', 'Be alert. Be on guard', 'You must be ready' when he wants us to be patient?

Because patience is not necessarily passive. Patience shouldn't go hand in hand with idleness or complacency. He wants us to wait with expectancy.

So if you are waiting for something, wait with patience, but with hope and expectancy. Expect that God will do great things. For he will, and he already is, even though you may not know it. And it may not come in the form you imagine or want, but we can always be assured of God's perfect Love and Goodness. He will be everything you need.

Wait! Good things are coming! Wait! Never before has the word wait seemed so exciting and promising!

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. Psalm 27:14

It's Eternity that really matters...

This morning driving to work I got a realisation - one of those moments when something you've known in your head all your life suddenly becomes crystal clear and make sense in your heart.

Eternity is what really matters.

I was listening to music and just got to the line
"Care less you think if I'm dope.
I could have the freshest rhyme flow.
I could have the dopest live show.
Without Him, don't mean a thing, so...." (Do Yo Thang - KJ-52)

Now, never mind if you life aspiration is not to be a rapper and be 'dope' with a 'fresh flow' and 'dope live shows'....the point of it is, all our aspirations and life goals don't mean a thing without God.

Eternity is what really matters.

We get so caught up in the business and busyness of living our day to day lives that I think we often forget this vital point.

We can't take it with us. The things we strive for on earth are really insubstantial, temporary and fleeting. We worry so much about them, but in the end we can't take it with us. We might work all our lives and store up fame, money, possessions coming out our ears - but then we die and what does it all count for then? That's when we have to deal with eternity - then all that stuff we had on earth really means nothing.

And yet we worry so much about our physical lives, and spend so much of our time focussing on them.

It must be so much worse for those who don't believe in God and don't know there is an eternity waiting for them. Acquiring things, searching for something to make them happy, fulfilled - to make life seem meaningful consumes us. And destroys us.

Because there is NOTHING in our earthly life that can make life meaningful. Anything , no matter how good it my seem to us, without God it is worthless. Pointless. Empty.

It's like when you have a bad nights sleep because you were tossing and turning worrying about things, and all things you had to get done the next day were even invading your dreams. You wake up in the morning feeling anxious and stressed and overwhelmed.

Then, when the bad dreams dissolve away, when you actually look clearly at what you have to get done, or at the problems you were worried about, they turn out to be not so bad.

In the middle of the night all our worries are amplified because we're half asleep, thoughts become large and all out of perspective in dream land, and we're consumed with it because there's nothing else to think about but our problems.

The night time is like life on earth - it's right in front of us, dominating our thoughts. And so those daily things become everything. But we forget what we should be really focussing on.

Eternity.

It's like waking up. And then everything falls back into perspective and we see what really matters. This life is temporary - we're visitors here. Our real life is when we are with Him in heaven for eternity.

Sleeping to waking.
Sleep walking to living.

Death to LIFE.

When I was younger I used to imagine that the life I thought I was living was really one big dream, and one day I was going to wake up into my real life. I'd wake up and find that my real life was completely different to the one I had thought I was living while I was actually dreaming.

It wasn't until later that I realised that my childish imagination wasn't so far off the truth!

What are you storing up for yourself? Are life's troubles, the world's goals and aims, possessions, money...are these things consuming your thoughts, taking your eyes off the real goal?

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6: 19-21

When you 'wake up' and find that all the physical things around you that you thought were so important have disappeared, what is going to be left? A fleeting memory of an insubstantial life and whole pile of 'stuff' that is now worthless. Or the comfort, and peace, and real, lasting joy of a relationship with God, no matter how difficult or troubled the path was.

'There your heart will be also'. When we see everything in the light of Heaven, our troubles and worries on earth seem so small. "Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face, and the things on earth become strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace." (My favourite hymn). So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. 1 Peter 1:6

Don't conform, be transformed. (Romans 12:2) Don't worry that everyone else is concerned and consumed with worldly things. You don't want to miss out on eternity with God because you were too worried about fitting in for a few years on earth.

So, in the words of KJ-52, 'Care less you think if I'm dope....Without God it don't mean a thing, so bring it....Go ahead and just do yo thang'.

:)

When People Drive You Crazy

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Mark 12:30-31

The two greatest commandments are Love God. And Love your neighbour as yourself.

That doesn't just mean the people you like, or the ones that are nice to you.

The people in our lives aren't always going to lift us up, encourage us or even like us. But that doesn't mean they weren't put there for a reason. It could be a family member, someone you work with, even friends aren't always what we want them to be.

But before you get angry or frustrated again, before you try to cut them out of your life thinking how much easier it would be if they weren't in it - think about what purpose they might be serving.

I always love the thought, 'be careful what you ask God for' - if you ask him to make you more patient, he probably won't go, 'zap' you're more patient - he'll probably let you go through a challenging situation that teaches you to be patient through experience!

We are like uncut diamonds, still caked in dirt and rough. The people we come across, especially those who grate against us, can often do us the most benefit. Sometimes that person who we can't stand is there to teach us tolerance, or patience, or compassion. And we are in their lives to show God's love.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
John 13: 34-35

Before you come across this person again, pray for them - but not "God, please make this person stop being so annoying!" - Bless them. Find something about them to thank God for. Or at least ask God to show you what you can learn from the situation.

There's a quote I read that said 'Have you ever asked God to change someone else, only to have him say "Well, you're here now. Why don't we start with you." There are a lot of things in life that we put on other people, when really it lays within ourselves. We don't have control over how anyone else acts or behaves. We only have control over ourselves. When you forgive someone, it's not really for them. It's so that you aren't eaten up and destroyed by harbouring those negative feelings. When you bless others, God blesses us in return.

"But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."

Matthew 5: 44-48

But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.

Luke 6:27-28

It's one of the hardest things in life, to love the people who you don't even like! But God loved us first, even when we were unworthy.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

And it's not all off our own backs - the love we have for others comes from God. Ask him every day to help you see other's through his eyes! It's a daily challenge, I know!! But he'll help you.

How can we know God's Will?

God's will is not some impossible puzzle - often we do just have to trust Him and won't be able to see everything, nor should we try to sometimes because we just trip ourselves up - but he does give us everything we need to be able to move with Him and follow his plan for our lives. He is not sending us out in a dark maze without a map or a light.

So how are we meant to find our way?

Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path. Psalm 119:105

His word is our guide. But it's not much good if we don't know it, or if we don't have that relationship with God for Him to show us how to use that light! God's word is not a big, dry rule book or instruction manual. It is living, alive, like running water!

Want to know my (somewhat imperfect) analogy for the difference between knowing vs understanding God's will? Not just for women, even though I've put it in my Women series. 




Verses I used in the video:

For the word of God is LIVING and active. Hebrews 4:12 

Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, ‘Out of his heart will flow rivers of LIVING water.' John 7:37-38

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-- his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2 

Knowing vs Understanding. From the Inside Out

Romans 12:2  Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-- his good, pleasing and perfect will.

When God's word comes from within us, when it is hidden in our hearts, when it is an ingrained part of us - that is when we live in God's will. That's when we don't need to come to a crisis or a crossroads and cry out "Now, tell me what to do God!" - because we've already been walking with him daily.

The Bible is more than giant rule book imposing itself on our lives - God is more than a task master, shouting orders from the sky.

When we think of it that way, we're inclined to buckle under the pressure - to one day shout, "I give up, God. All this is too hard. I need a break from feeling like my life never lives up to your standards." I've done that before. It took me a long time to realise, however, that it wasn't God applying that pressure to me, it was my own created perception of God.

God was actually there saying, "I love you. You're my child. My precious daughter. I love you. I'm right here - take my hand. I can carry you through this storm."

But I didn't even notice that loving God - I was too busy seething at my own image.

God is also more than an emergency contact, just there when things get crazy and we can't do it ourselves any more. Because the fact is, we can't do anything ourselves. It might seem to work for a while, but eventually we are going to realise that everything we are doing is leading us down a futile path.

How much better to walk with Him daily - to include Him in every step we take, so that our steps are in line with His - so that when he moves, we are right there to move along with Him.